My Serenity Prayer in a Changing World

Some 13 years ago, I sent my eldest off from home to study in a foreign country. Reluctant though my husband and I were, we had to, as tertiary education opportunities were limited then, and we would be curtailing his potential in keeping him here. I had expected him to complete his studies, return home to Malaysia to work, and to resume his life.

As it happens, he decides to stay on in the country he has grown to love, and over the years he has brought a brother and sister with him to further their studies. Younger brother completes his education, gets into Big 5 and settles down there too. Fast forward, youngest sister is pursuing tertiary studies, and he's even moved his parents there too. But that is a separate story.

He has been home lots since then. Last week he came back home on a special mission. He is on the trade delegation accompanying his Prime Minister in the signing of the FTA with Malaysia.

I have not seen him as much as I wish to, on this trip back home he's been busy on the many functions in his role as a delegate of the NZ Government. He's been on the motorcade as the entourage travels through the infamous traffic jams of his hometown, with a couple dozen policemen clearing a way for them. He's been visiting Malaysian affiliates of NZ corporations with his PM. He's been in the company of high ranking Malaysian and NZ Government officials and corporate men.

Am I affected by all this hoopla? No, because I have not even been able to catch much of him, despite there being flashes of him on the late night news. And no, because this is part of his work.

Am I proud of him? Yes I confess so, him doing what he is doing for the country he is living in now, and him making small inroads in his career, business and social work. Return home to Malaysia? Well he's showing me that he can work and live there, and can return home in style :) It is surreal but it has also brought home to me that the world we live in is really not that big after all.

My expectation has evolved – I have long since learnt to give it up for the greater good and entrust my sons' future in their own hands.

These days I travel to NZ more and it seems like the country I sent my children to with so much trepidation back then has also become like a second home to me. Meanwhile I continue to be mindful that life is ever evolving...

"God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know
the difference."

This prayer encourages me and I wish that it will you too.

In memory of ...

Lately I have been prompted on how evanescent life can be. It didn’t help that people – no matter if I did or did not know them personally - were called home from their sojourn on earth, expectedly or otherwise. July ‘09, Michael Jackson was stopped in his tracks as he prepared to embark on a long awaited revival. A month later much loved Malaysian story-teller Yasmin Ahmad made an unexpected exit in the midst of another exciting project. Then my brother-in-law Steven succumbed to health problems leaving family members grieving in his wake.

It was in this mood that I learnt of yet another departure barely 2 weeks on. Two Sundays ago, on a hazy September morning, I was there to send good old Uncle Dato’ Maniam off on his last journey. It was poignant for me in that he was a reminder of the time I had worked in HSS, where “Uncle” had been a Consultant in since its early days. That he had fought a good fight, was now relieved of any pain from his ailing health and would be in a better place is my small piece of hope of comfort for the family of relatives and workmates that he has left behind.

“Uncle Maniam” was “the” grand old man of HSS. In the years that I had worked there, through staff gatherings, his presence around the office, through many management meetings, I saw a knowledgeable man, a valiant soldier, a compassionate soul; fearless in his prodding, wealthy in his wisdom and support.

In brief, Uncle had had a successful civil service and had retired some 30 years ago. I had the honour to co-interview him for an article for the Company’s in-house magazine, and had the privilege of an insight into the background of his career, his work ethics and the various contributions he had made in the public sector.

Call it selective memory or sentimentalism. But the Uncle I shall remember is one who has left a fatherly image that I can cherish. As with Michael Jackson, Yasmin Ahmad, brother-in-law Steven, may Uncle’s soul rest in peace among the angels.

KL takes a Hari Raya break

For the past one month Muslims have been fasting through the holy month of “Ramadan” and during this period, they fast from sunrise to sunset. As such most office workers and school children are allowed home early to prepare for the breaking of fast. This means heavy movement and traffic gridlock in the hours prior to it as people try to be home in time to celebrate with family members.

Today is Hari Raya Puasa, it marks the end of the fasting month, and the start of the month of “Syawal". This sees a heavy exodus of people leaving the city for their hometowns of origin to celebrate with kin. Here is where “balik kampong” takes on its full meaning. It also means the city takes a break from the usual humdrum of the rat race as offices and schools close for two days. This year Hari Raya Puasa falls on Sunday, and it is an extended weekend, and therefore a good excuse for non-Muslims to get away too!

I normally will not drive into the hotspots of the city, avoiding them like the plague. Not today, as I take the camera and hit the streets in the heart of Kuala Lumpur and enjoying the views - here are some shots taken on the second day of the festival.

Do you know these places (9 pictures)? Recognise some of them? Send me your answers, let's see if you get them all right!

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Notice that the roads are much quieter - a stark contrast to the usually busy, chaotic, lively and noisy jams that are so much a part of KL.

Clue: These are popular roads and landmarks...

Have fun!

Book Review - "Desperation" by Stephen King

Although reading is considerably a much loved preoccupation I haven't been doing much of it at all. It is only lately I have procured some free space and time to indulge in such pleasures, and landed myself with an old book lying in the bookshelves. Not my best choice at returning to reading but it served the purpose for the moment.

"Desperation" by Stephen King was un-nerving and scary in opening up the horrors of evil and suffering the perpetual fight of good against evil. Noticeably it was more of a spiritual war here. Characters were portrayed with their all their realistic peculiarities such that it was easy to identify with them, and characters there were a plenty. Spooky in huge doses and mysterious in parts, it was a captivating read.

This, I will venture to say, is not for the faint-hearted, nor for the "home alone" nights. There is a challenge posed by Stephen King in the synopsis - "enter if you dare". Not a frivolous statement as I was to discover.

Still it may lead me on to more Stephen Kings to come!

Hot Cross Buns

Hot cross buns! One a penny, two a penny hot cross buns!

The rhyme rang in my head as I played with the dough. And though it wasn't Good Friday I had just wanted to find out what this famous bread tasted like. For curiosity's sake...

I got my answer - it is a tangy fruit bun, smells of cinnamon and spice and all things nice.. and is at its best hot and fresh from the oven. Though I might have done an injustice to the dough and texture as I was short on yeast. Oops!

And then I also found out that the cross did not sync with the bun - it was hard and detached!

Note to myself: Although the recipe says water and flour for the cross, I could include some butter and sugar for taste..

Leftovers were reheated and eaten with butter and marmalade jam - still fabulously delightful for breakfast.

On reflection, I should do this at Easter - for sure there will be a "rise" then :-)

Good ole' fashioned Fruit Cake

This fruit cake was baked in July, and left to keep for 3 weeks. I know I promised to update on the outcome of it all and this posting is long overdue. Still it's better late than never, and at least I can sit back on this one.

Well I can say it has survived and passed the cake tasting (with the folks around, and friends)with good results!

This is how it looked when it came out from the oven.

After more than 3 weeks of being soaked in brandy this is how it looked.

Texture: A little crumbly still, but the body stood well, the fruits well spread out, I think the high protein flour withstood the weight of the fruits well. Moist but not heavy. Easy to the bite, although I wished it was more solid.

Taste: An initial taste and smell of brandy, a fruity flavour, and the texture of the cake makes it memorable and satisfying at least for me. Having decreased the sugar, it felt good as the fruits with alcohol imparted a natural sweet taste.

Feedback: Some pretty encouraging remarks on the flavour and smell. Great stuff - thanks Edmonds!

Note: I used Brandy XO on the cake. Also the taste seemed to grow better the longer it kept. I had some stored in the fridge and it kept for another 3 weeks, moist soft and tasting even better from the storing. Just needed to keep it wrapped and covered.

Hmmm should be good for Christmas...

Pandan Sponge Cake

Further to my earlier post on pandan kuih (Kuih Seri Muka-Aug 13), I realised it was actually Pandan Sponge Cake, and not the kuih kuih. Anyhow as my curiosity got the better of me, I searched for the recipe online, found and liked the one at thestar's Kuali, from Amy Beh.

I must have done something out of sync, or the fire wasn't right, or is it the recipe? That final one is a defence, after all "a poor carpenter blames his tools". Is it?

Here's the recipe:

4 large eggs
125g sugar
125g flour, pinch of salt sifted together
1 tbsp pandan juice
1/8 tsp pandan essence
60g butter, melted


Method
Grease and flour a 23cm round cake tin. Preheat oven to 180°C. Place eggs and sugar in a mixing bowl over a large pan of simmering water and whisk briskly until mixture thickens and almost doubles in volume.Remove bowl from the simmering water and continue to whisk until mixture turns cool. Mix in sifted flour. Gradually drizzle in the cooled melted butter. Fold in gently with a metal spoon.Pour mixture into prepared tin. (smoothen the surface with a spatula.) bake in preheated oven for 25 to 30 minutes or until cooked. The cake is cooked if the surface is golden brown and it shrinks slightly from the sides of the tin.Remove cake from oven and leave to cool in the tin for five to six minutes before turning out on a wire rack.

Having followed the recipe to the "t", I am puzzled - can anyone help?

By the way, I have an even bigger bump on this than on the "seri muka"...

















Inside the hump:

I know it looks funny - try not to laugh ok.

As it looks, the texture is hard, not sponge as its supposed to be. Pandan flavour is not very strong as I did not use essence,but fresh pandan juice only, but not quite enough. Our pandan plant is still very young and the dry season is not doing it favours, the leaves were rather dry therefore too litte juice and not fragrant enough. But its not about the taste alone, as totally I am disappointed with the outcome of this mis-adventure.

My late mother-in-law used to tell a tale of how her first cakes turned out flat, and how my father-in-law would call such cake "ah ngek", how he would tease her about her baking. But she overcame all the "ah ngeks" and had become such a wonderfully good cook. If she was around, I know what she will most certainly say - "don't let ah ngek stop you - try till you get it right"

Just what I will do... Meanwhile I shall search for another recipe and try to find out what went wrong. Watch this space...

Peek at nature in Langkawi

Here are some shots taken over the weekend - of nature - some by lazy indulgence, some by chance and others with a little composure ahem..

Clouds over skies approaching Langkawi. No wonder it rained so much while we were there.

So close to nature - a squirrel was minding its own business, making music and dancing in its courtship ritual. We humans are such voyeurs.... In case you missed, it's right there on the lone coconut trunk.

Padi fields along the highway.


Casuarina leaves fringing the sky

A mountain slope on the way up Mount Mat Cincang, the highest peak on the island where views of the surrounding islands are afforded. Also usually visible are Cambrian-age forests and the island Sumatra on a good day. However we were greeted upon arrival on the cable cars - by mist, winds and pouring rain on the peak - robbed of a chance at the glorious view and a walk across the suspension bridge...

These are shops alongside the road fronting the Cenang beach - they are well landscaped with a rural ambience. Looks like Batu Ferringhi in Penang

Parasailing in Cenang Beach while the sun was having a field day.

Coconuts freshly plucked and waiting - in the background chalets for rent

The lure of azure skies, white sands and a vast beach - Cenang Beach

Just for the fun of it - blue and green do match!

And then the rain came, and stayed...

I like this pic taken from the car we were in - the effect of water, wind creates some movement in a dull picture like this.

Salad for Monday anyone?

After a weekend of dining, meeting folks and friends, it's Monday again. Not wanting to stuff any more rice or noodles, nor any starchy soup, I settled for ....




a cucumber tomato lettuce and egg salad with a favourite of french dressing - simple and satisfying. My brewed hot and fragrant Lipton tea afterwards was heaven... Bon apetit all the way!